Year 3 English: Checking and improving a draft
Part of the Year 3 English writing stories chapter. Chapter overview · whole chapter on one page
Checking and improving a draft
Writers check a draft in stages: first the meaning, then the vocabulary, then the grammar and the punctuation. The checklist in the table helps.
| Check | Question to ask |
|---|---|
| Tense | Is every verb in the same tense? |
| Pronouns | Is it clear who he, she, it or they means? |
| Vocabulary | Is any word vague, or repeated too often? |
| Paragraphs | Does each paragraph have one idea? |
| Speech | Are the spoken words in inverted commas? |
| Reading aloud | Does it sound right when it is read aloud, with a clear tone and volume? |
Here is Ruby's first draft. It has no paragraphs yet.
Ruby's first draft (draft, not yet checked)
Ruby and Kofi went to the park. It was a nice day. Ruby got her kite out and it went up high. Then the wind got it stuck in a tree. Ruby was sad. Kofi ran to get the keeper. She came with a pole and gets it down. Ruby said thank you to her.
Key ideas
- Check a draft for meaning, vocabulary, grammar and punctuation, one stage at a time.
- Keep the same tense through a story, unless the writer has a reason to change it.
- A pronoun, such as he, she or it, must clearly point to one person or thing.
- Replace a repeated noun with a pronoun, but only when the reader will know who is meant.
- Read the story aloud, so you can hear what the reader will hear.
Method. Look for a word that tells the reader very little.
- Find the key words in the question. These words tell us where to look: vague.vague
- Find the words in the text that answer it. The text says:It was a nice day.
- Write the answer. nice
Check. Nice could describe any day, so it is vague. ✓
Watch out. Accept: a more precise adjective can replace nice, for example sunny or bright.
Method. Look for the verb that is not in the past tense.
- Find the key words in the question. These words tell us where to look: tense.tense
- Find the words in the text that answer it. The text says:She came with a pole and gets it down.
- Write the answer. gets
Check. Came, went and was are past tense; gets is present. ✓
Method. Replace the pronoun with the noun it stands for.
- Find the pronoun. Her could mean Mrs Hall or someone else, so it is not clear.her
- Name the person. The keeper is the person who helped, so use the noun.the keeper
- Write the answer. Ruby thanked the keeper.
Check. The keeper is named, so the reader knows who was thanked. ✓
Watch out. Accept any sentence that names the keeper, such as Ruby thanked the park keeper.
Watch out
Watch out: changing a tense in one place can make the rest of the story wrong. Check the whole story after you change a verb.
Exam tip
Grown-up tip. Read the draft aloud together. Your child should point to any sentence that sounds wrong, then fix it. You can listen for the tone and the volume they use for the speech.
Exercise 10F Practice: checking and improving a draft
Method. Look for a word that could describe almost anything.
- Find the key words in the question. These words tell us where to look: vague.vague
- Find the words in the text that answer it. The text says:It was a nice day.
- Write the answer. nice
Check. Nice tells the reader very little. ✓
Method. Compare the verb with came, which is past tense.
- Find the key words in the question. These words tell us where to look: tense.tense
- Find the words in the text that answer it. The text says:She came with a pole and gets it down.
- Write the answer. gets
Check. Gets is present, so it should be past. ✓
Method. Look at the other verbs in the draft.
- Look at the other verbs. The draft uses came, went and was, which are all past tense.came; went; was
- Change gets. The past tense of get is got.got
- Write the answer. got
Check. She came with a pole and got it down. ✓
Method. Look for a name that comes back again and again.
- Find the key words in the question. These words tell us where to look: repeated.repeated
- Find the words in the text that answer it. The text says:Ruby got her kite out / Ruby was sad / Ruby said thank you to her
- Write the answer. Ruby
Check. Ruby appears three times in these sentences. ✓
Method. Replace the pronoun with the noun.
- Find the pronoun. Her is not clear, because the draft has more than one person in it.her
- Name the keeper. The noun the keeper tells the reader who was thanked.the keeper
- Write the answer. Ruby thanked the keeper. Accept any sentence that names the keeper, for example: Ruby thanked the park keeper.
Check. Naming the keeper makes the sentence clear. ✓
Method. Put the spoken words in inverted commas, and use a comma before the speech tag.
- Find the spoken words. The words that Ruby says are thank you.thank you
- Add the inverted commas. The spoken words go inside the inverted commas, then a comma, then said Ruby.Thank you, said Ruby.
- Write the answer. Accept any direct speech with the words in inverted commas and a comma, for example: 'Thank you,' said Ruby.
Check. The spoken words are in inverted commas. ✓
Method. Look for the point where the idea changes.
- Find the problem. The problem starts with Then the wind got it stuck in a tree.Then the wind
- Find the solution. Kofi ran to get the keeper, which starts the way the problem is solved.Kofi ran
- Write the answer. Accept Then (when the problem starts) or Kofi (when the solution starts).
Check. A new paragraph starts when the idea changes. ✓
Method. Choose adjectives that paint a clearer picture.
- Choose the adjectives. Bright and windy tell the reader what the day was like.bright; windy
- Write the noun phrase. The adjectives go before the noun day.a bright, windy day
- Write the answer. Accept any precise noun phrase, for example: a bright, windy day.
Check. A bright, windy day is precise. ✓
Method. Think about what a reader would notice.
- Think about the meaning. Listening shows whether the story makes sense.makes sense
- Think about the grammar. Listening also shows whether the tense or the pronouns are wrong.tense or pronouns
- Write the answer. Accept any two, for example: whether the sentences make sense; the tense; the pronouns; the speech marks.
Check. Reading aloud shows meaning and grammar. ✓
Method. Think about the feeling in each part of the story.
- Choose pauses. A pause builds up a moment, such as the kite going up high.pause after the kite
- Choose quiet places. Reading more quietly shows a sad or calm moment, such as Ruby was sad.Ruby was sad
- Write the answer. Accept any two pauses and two quiet places, with a reason, for example: pause after the kite went up high, because it is an important moment.
Check. Tone and pauses show the feeling of the story. ✓
Method. Think about the good and the bad side of a pronoun.
- Think about the good side. A pronoun such as she avoids repeating a name, so the writing flows.avoids repetition
- Think about the bad side. If two people could be meant, the reader cannot tell which one is meant.two people could be meant
- Write the answer. Accept any answer that says a pronoun avoids repetition, but it must be clear which person or thing it means.
Check. A pronoun must point clearly to one person or thing. ✓